May 16-13

Can you believe it? We are officially halfway through the Contentment Challenge today! I'm celebrating by going Strawberry picking tomorrow before my double-wedding weekend, then making this delicious Strawberry Shortcake Recipe with Will. (He doesn't know it yet, but I'm sure he'll be happy to participate, even if it's only by eating them.) Now it's your turn to celebrate! Your homework is to find something to do, big or small, this weekend to mark this milestone. Something that reminds you that living life is better than getting stuff. Then be sure to Instagram your activity and include #contentmentchallenge in your post!

(source)

So let's hear it! What fun activity will you do to mark this halfway point?

Comments: 2

  1. Hannah Elizabeth May 17, 2013 3:01 am

    YUM! This officially made me hungry :)

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May 15-13

I'm so honored to be featured on Style Me Pretty today! Working with A Southern Soiree, as always, was a complete joy. Their team never misses a beat, and they provide an amazing service to every bride in their attention to detail and ease of planning. I also have to say that Erin and Jon, the adorable bride and groom, were some of the most heartfelt, kind people I've ever worked with. I felt like I was part of their family by the end of the day, and their sweet mom (who sent me this gift recently) put several personal touches on their wedding day herself.

Thank you so much to Style Me Pretty for featuring Erin and Jon's beautiful wedding! Click here to see the feature. And be sure to go leave a comment on their lovely site!

Comments: 2

  1. Dajuan May 15, 2013 11:39 am

    Beautiful Nancy. And congratulations to you and Meagan on the sweat feature of Erin and Jon’s wedding day!

  2. Erin May 15, 2013 7:03 pm

    We just think you’re the best. ever!

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May 14-13

“Five years from today, you will be the same person that you are today, except for the books you read and the people you meet.”
― Charlie Jones

My Dad used to tell me that quote all the time when I was growing up. I always thought it was an exaggeration, until I became a reader. Now I believe it with all of my heart.

Over the past few weeks, I've been thinking a lot about my book choices. If you know me at all, you know that I love to read. I try to at least read 1 book/month: I call it "12 in 12" on my goals, and this year I upped it to "15 in 12." I have 3 Pinterest Boards dedicated to books that I recommend: 1. Life + Faith, 2. Business, 3. Enjoyment. I also tag my books with #nancyrayreads on Instagram, which has been a really fun way to share what I'm currently reading! So yes, I'm a reader. I absolutely love books, and believe that 1 good book can change your life forever.

I began thinking of how I choose the books I read, and how I have time to read them all. I thought I would share that with you today, in hopes to turn you into a reader too! Here is my simple philosophy on choosing and reading books:

1. Only select books that come recommended by a trusted source
2. Choose a balance of books that touch on every aspect of life
3. Read a little every day (I read at least 15 pages/day, during my morning routine)
4. Read one book at a time

It's really a simple philosophy! And it works for me. I know it may not work for you, but I've acheived a lot of success when abiding by these 4 guidelines. My husband would disagree with #4 - he loves to read several books at once. I, however, am not a multitasker like he is! I like to read 1 book at a time. The point is - do what works for you.

This year, I am basing my book choices on the Life Balance Wheel. (Note: There are several versions of the Life Balance Wheel, but I like Zig Ziglar's Wheel of Life best.) This way, I can make sure I am reading books to enhance each major category of my life. I believe that a well balanced life is a happy life, and that is what I strive for even in my readings.

Before reading my 2013 Book list, you'll notice a few things:

1. There is an uneven number of books in each category. That's because I just keep adding to my list of books I want to read, and when I find a new one I place them in the appropriate category. I might not get to all of the listed books in 2013, but I will roll them over to 2014 if needed.
2.  Some are marked with an asterisk (*). Those mark the books I have already read this year.
3. There are more categories than listed in the Wheel of Life. That's because I have split some of the categories into two, in order to create more specific categories to accurately reflect my life.
5. The "Social Relationships" Category books all fall within other categories, since they are books that I am simply reading with my small group, book club, or friends.  (Ex: Greater = Spiritual, Leadership Matters = Career.)

So, here we go!

Nancy Ray Reads : 2013 Book List

Spirituality
- Seven*
- Weird*
- Radical*
- Descending into Greatness

Finances
- The Monk and the Merchant*
- Think and Grow Rich*

Career
- Margin
- Martha's Rules
- The Art of Possibility
- Unnecessary Endings

Marriage and Family Relationships
- The Meaning of Marriage

Social Relationships: Book Clubs and Small Group readings
- Greater*
- Daring Greatly*
- Leadership Matters (Currently Reading)
- What you do best in the body of Christ 

Personal + Intellectual Development
- His Excellency George Washington
- Bonhoeffer
- Boundaries for Leaders

Health (Physical Well-Being)
- Wheat Belly
- Born to Run

Rest and Relaxation (Physical Well-Being)
- The Great Gatsby*
- The Storyteller

•••

I hope this helped you! I encourage you... no, I implore you! Become a reader if you're not one already. It takes a little self discipline, and it pays off greatly.

Please leave a comment with any books you recommend that I add to my list! I would love to hear from you!

Comments: 7

  1. Liz May 14, 2013 11:13 am

    Hi Nancy – as an English Lit major, I stopped reading after graduating from college – too many tutorials, no writing/reading for pleasure and a lot of analytics!! Just started consistently again and some on your recommendation :) I find reading on the subway is a good time to get through some chapters. One good book I read recently is Lucky Girl by Mel-Ling Hopgood, which details her reconnection with her Taiwanese family after being adopted from there by a Western family. Another one is called The Girls Who Went Away, about forced adoption in the 60′s and that I could not put down for ages!! I tend to like books with a social justice or real life component :) Sometimes I wish I liked fiction as much as some people do! :) That’s great that you make it such a priority.

  2. Kristine May 14, 2013 2:22 pm

    I really love this idea, Nancy, of making sure you’re reading books that make you well-rounded and touch on the different aspects of your life. I’m definitely adopting this approach! I finally finished reading 7 after putting it down for a few months–such an incredible book. I always suggest any book by Anne Lamott, especially her newest Help, Thanks, Wow (such a fast read and so inspiring). I have so many books on marriage but one of my favorites is Committed by Elizabeth Gilbert. And a really great business book I read awhile ago was The E Myth. I still find myself using some of the strategies listed in there. Thanks for sharing your 2013 list with us!

  3. Jude May 14, 2013 8:33 pm

    Hey Nancy, we met while camping a few weeks ago, and I promised to leave a comment, so here it is! :) I am an avid reader too, and by avid I mean, my boys have had to fetch clean socks from the laundry basket because I was too engrossed in a book to fold the laundry! I am definitely trying to balance reading helpful, spiritual, based books with pure enjoyment ones.
    I did just finish a GREAT novel though, which I read in just a few days. “The Lost Wife” by Alyson Richman
    SO good.
    Do you ever keep track of your books through an online site like Good Reads?

  4. Ashleigh May 15, 2013 3:44 am

    Sweet Nancy, it’s been so long since we did the deb ball together but I wanted to tell you how much I love your blog! I’ve read most of the books on your list– you’ve got great taste. For health books, you should check out the Beauty Detox Diet by Kim Snyder. It’s awesome! xoxo

  5. Erin May 15, 2013 12:37 pm

    Hey, Nance-pants! I’m SO EXCITED you posted your 2013 book list and reading thoughts. If you haven’t already, read The History of Love by Nicole Krauss – I can’t even begin to tell you why. I’m trying to keep a running list of my own on my Avelist account (http://avelist.com/ind6957) if you’re interested!! Hope you’re well!!

  6. Meredith May 17, 2013 10:43 am

    I’m currently reading Jon Acuff’s new book, Start, and it’s awesome! I would definitely recommend it for the career category, although you are already pretty full there! :)

  7. ANNIE May 17, 2013 6:15 pm

    Thank you Nancy, this post has come at a perfect time. I am a reader. Or rather, I certainly have been. I enjoy reading. I have been slipping into bad habits for some time now. I used to catch public transport to and from work, and a train journey provided the perfect opportunity to devour books. Now I drive daily, which means I do a lot more listening to the radio, but very little reading. A goal I am working on is to get into bed at 9:30pm, and have half and hour to do nothing but read before lights out. I can see that this done five nights per week would make a huge difference. Thus far I have achieved one night… last night! (Gotta start somewhere!). Thank you for the reminders of “read a little each day” and “read one book at a time”. I like these. Annie x

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May 13-13

Dear Mama,

Thank you for teaching me to focus on what matters most in life.

I will always remember to appreciate the beauty around me, to always have a bluebird house (and to stop and look at the bluebird eggs with children), to make time for traditions, to bake together in the kitchen (and not be afraid to make a mess), to laugh, to sing and harmonize, to play an instrument, to write thank you notes, to make time for family. I will always be grateful for the "little things in life" like a ripe cantaloupe, a beautiful song, tacky Christmas lights, a full tank of gas, a clean car, and an organized kitchen. I will remember to do all of this because of your example to me.

I will never be rude, or selfish, or harsh with children; I will not judge others or be jealous of what others have, I will not want "bigger and better," because you've taught me that more often than not, a simpler life is better. I will invest wisely and make sure I budget for vacations and memories, because those were always your favorite ways to spend money. I will not cut people off with my speech, be impatient, or drive recklessly. (Thanks to your advice and Papa's, I will always "drive defensively.") I learned what to do and what not to do from your example to me.

I will always put the Lord first, read my Bible, be kind, and love those most important to me. I will listen to positive voices, not negative ones, even while I'm getting ready or driving in my car (like you do).  I will stay organized with my planner and notes like you taught me to so well (although I may not ever write as many notes as you do!) I will always stick to my North Carolina Southern roots, saying "Yes ma'am and yes sir," and I'll teach my future kids to do the same. I will always love a screened in porch the way you do, because there's nothing quite like it. And I will take time to slow down and rest, because it's important to maintain your life that way. I'll sing hymns and think of you every time, because they are your favorite. I learned these beautiful and important lessons because of your example to me.

I love you, Mama. Happy birthday and mother's day!

(photos taken last week in her adorable backyard, when I celebrated her birthday in Nashville)

Comments: 4

  1. Em May 13, 2013 11:57 am

    Love your mama! These are all amazing things to have learned from her!

  2. Cassie May 13, 2013 4:53 pm

    Nancy, this was amazing! Your mama inspires me through your writing-what a wonderful woman!

  3. Noelani May 13, 2013 8:46 pm

    Oh, this is just simply beautiful. I can only imagine how happy it made your mama ;)

  4. Debbie Miller ..Mom May 14, 2013 10:34 am

    I read this yesterday and it has taken me this long to compose myself. Thank you my precious daughter. All these things I learned from my daddy and mama and grandparents. So you will pass them along too. God is so good.
    I love you so….Mom

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May 09-13

source

I feel like my heart is in a new place lately. I like the place that I've found, a place of rest and peace. A place of true happiness.

I've discovered something during this Contentment Challenge:

Life is better lived when you actually start living.
When you start doing things.
When you take a deep breath in and live in the moment.
When you stay active.
When you replace stuff with experiences.

I think that's what we all look for when we walk into Target or a beautiful store like Anthropologie - we are looking for that experience of beauty around us.  But I've realized it's so fleeting - even the things we end up purchasing because they look pretty in that moment - even their beauty is fleeting. Pretty soon it will be a retired article of clothing in your closet along with the rest of it.

Gaining this perspective has been literally life changing. We are almost halfway through, and I already feel like a new person! Yes, there have been things I've wanted, but because I realize I do not need it, I simply focus on what I do have and move on with my life.

So how have I started living, you ask?

For starters, I rode my bike 8 miles this morning, then I ran 2. I've watched movies with Will and spent more quality time with him. I've read more books than I ever thought I would be able to this year. I've eliminated online shopping from my life, thus freeing up more meaningful time for myself. I've taken more bubble baths. I've journaled more. And I'm picking strawberries this weekend!

Living life > Shopping. Period.

What are some things that you have done to make your life more meaningful? How have you replaced the time you used to spend shopping?

Comments: 5

  1. ANNIE May 9, 2013 6:32 pm

    Nancy, I count down until these Thursday posts. So inspiring. I’m failing a little bit at the moment. I haven’t put a foot out of budget so far (although my budget is a little bit larger than yours at present), but I don’t feel I’m fully in the “start living” zone as yet. (Which may also be because I am inching towards winter/hibernation). This post is such lovely encouragement. I certainly have had days where the distractions are turned off, and subsequently it is amazing what you can fit into 24 hours. I’m so pleased the challenge is going well for you. All the best x

  2. Mariya May 10, 2013 11:57 am

    I am really loving your posts! You are so inspiring and encouraging in your daily living. I didn’t join the challenge, but I am seeing myself shop less and less nowadays. I am just tired of the mall and browsing through clothes. I am grateful for what I have and I have enough. So, I also wanna go through my closet and donate my clothes that I don’t wear. God bless you! :)

  3. Breanna May 10, 2013 5:43 pm

    These posts are so refreshing! I have struggled with simply living a lot lately. I am a full time student, and I often get caught up in dreaming about my future. The fact is I am married to an amazing guy, this spring has been beautiful, and I have plenty to be thankful for. This is always such a great reminder for the start of my weekend. No shopping, no social media, just living the good life!

  4. Megan May 11, 2013 7:45 pm

    I am right there with you! We have turned the noise off. Detached from our phones, computer, and TV. Now when we sit down, it’s to watch a movie together. Quality over quantity. The rain has finally cleared up and we are spending more time outside, and I take a bubble bath every. single. day. It has been a great way to focus & take care of me with no distractions!

  5. Meredith May 14, 2013 7:40 pm

    This is a great post. Very eye opening and fulfilling!

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Photographer, wife, and worshiper... I am a Southern girl who looks most forward to waking up each morning to drink my coffee, read my Bible, and soak in the beauty that surrounds me. These pages chronicle my work, my life, and the things that I love most. Thanks for visiting, I do hope you stay a while!
Nancy Ray